Tantrums are killer. Sometimes I deal with them pretty well and sometimes I throw myself on the ground next to her because, literally… I have no idea what else to do. It’s so hard to deal with other people’s emotions and I constantly wonder why is it so hard? It’s like as soon as she starts crying my brain says “MAKE IT STOP!!” Why? I mean, of course, I feel bad that she is upset… Sometimes it’s that and I’m aggravated that she is upset because I gave her 3 noodles instead of 2 and even after taking back the third noodle, she is still freaking. It’s exhausting but that’s no excuse for me also throwing a fit. I’m working on myself when it comes to no yelling and patience. I think the hardest part for me is the lack of control. I can’t control the situation and sometimes I can’t get her to stop crying, she has to stop on her own; I love when a hug and an “it’s going to be okay” solves everything but it’s usually not that easy and that’s when I get anxious and upset with her. I think tantrums are the hardest part of parenting.
I can deal with the “no” phase and the unlimited amounts of energy, the biting while breastfeeding, and even the smacking/hitting phase is nothing for me compared to the tantrums that just come from no where and make the entire house just feel so sad and so irritated all at the same time. I’m always trying to remember what I should be doing to help her get through her tantrum and what not to do during her tantrums and it’s SO hard to remember! It’s so unnatural for me to deal with it in a kind and loving way because honestly, if I was EVER upset in public or even at home, my father would shut me down so quickly. “What is your problem? Just go shut up and sit somewhere for now.” There are so many resources online to figure out how you should deal with tantrums in a gentle and loving way but remembering them all will be the death of me. Most of time time I’m just trying to remember to breathe after she’s hit me in the face, hit her brother in the face, and then ran off and slammed a door or two… Oh yes, the “threenager” is a real thing and it came early for me, I guess!
Any moms out there have any special things they do to help lessen tantrums or maybe to ease getting through them? I’ve read probably every article out there on gentle discipline, peaceful parenting, etc, etc and I’m still trying to find something that really works and fits for our family. Usually she doesn’t even want to “hug it out.” It’s just screaming, smacking, and/or running away… I love her, I love parenting, but oy.. tantrums..
P.S. Here are some articles about peaceful parenting, gentle parenting, etc, in case anyone is in need 🙂