There is nothing to say. I can’t breathe…that is all I can think. I can’t breathe, I can’t breathe, I can’t….I’m dying. Oh my god…is this it? Is this my life? It can’t possibly end here. I have so many more things I want to do, so many more things I want to say, things I need to change, things I need to become better at, people that need to know I love them…why now?
They really mean it when they say your life flashes before your eyes and when it does, it may seem small…it just might seem like you accomplished absolutely nothing and that you never were able to get over your self-esteem issues and that you still consider yourself completely worthless and uncapable of doing anything meaningful.
You might regret. You might regret so much more than not doing the dishes. You’ll regret not saying goodnight to your babies properly. You’ll regret not kissing your husband goodnight because you were so wrapped up in arguing with a friend. You might feel incredibly lonely; like no one ever truly got to know you because you were so afraid of what they would think….and that might be it.
That could be the end and you could never get a chance to fix it or change it. So, do it now. Be happy because tomorrow you might draw your last breath and you might wish you had made up with that friend, you might wish you kissed your husband goodnight, you might wish that you had cuddled up close to those babies…
You can be whoever you want to be if you only remember that this is it. This is your life and it will speed by quicker than you can inhale a bowl of mac and cheese and whether or not you believe it doesn’t mean it isn’t true because that is how the truth works. You can choose to ignore it and that may be okay but it is still true. Love yourself. Even if it means you have to work towards it everyday, mantra after mantra, workout after workout, breath after breath, whatever it takes; love you.
Do what you dream of. Even if it is crazy or unrealistic. Who defines what is real or not? Who says you can’t travel? Who says I can’t write? Who says you can’t have everything you’ve ever wanted? It might not be easy…but you can have it. Reach for it and don’t look back at the people who tell you otherwise because in the end you are the only one who needs to be satisfied by your life. Run it. Run your life. It is only as amazing as you make it. So, breathe. Take a step. It gets easier.